… To stand in the garden.
Tutti loves the garden. Specifically, she loves gardening. Rather more specifically, she loves weeding. She can’t get enough of it. She can spend hours – actual hours – sitting in the grass, meticulously picking out the weeds. It doesn’t matter that she is fighting a losing battle against the onion grass and the aptly named Panic Veldt Grass (a grassy weed, which is, ironically, softer and more attractive than the actual grass, but which Tutti rips out with a blazing vengeance).
The Guru recently posted this on Facebook: “Tutti is sitting in the back garden removing the onion grass from around the buffalo grass. I say, why can’t all the grasses live happily together? That would set an example for the rest of us. Onion weeds have rights!”
And yet, because Tutti and the Guru are not friends on Facebook (so exasperated is Tutti with the Guru’s spiritual musings that she defriended and blocked him) she is unaware of his protestations. So, in blissful oblivion, she continues ripping out great chunks of grassy weed, smiling to herself, as she imagines the Buffalo Grass finally conquering it’s oniony nemesis, and flourishing into a thick, lustrous carpet of vibrant greenery…
Of course, that too is a pipe dream, because the second the grass starts to thrive, two great big ugly bush turkeys flap in and rip it all out again.
Ah, the circle of life.